Being, Human

Many times, I’ve written about opening up the space between stimulus and response. I’ve written about keeping an open mind, the value of fluidity over rigidity and the constancy of change. These are not easy things to do but I believe understanding and abiding by these practices leads to a happier life.

So often, we are called on or we’re calling on others to take a stand – that lets us know  where we stand relative to each other. And it feels settled. Fixed. Done. I lament this prevailing practice. It makes it so hard to be nuanced. Insisting that you take a side can be fine – for a while. But wait! Because, people, you are never done. Life is complicated, my friends. It is complex and multi-faceted. Even when we think we’ve got something figured out, something changes, and then suddenly we find ourselves in new territory with old precepts. Life is always changing and being unwilling to ever rethink your ways is likely going to wind up hurting you.

Of course, it’s important to develop and live by your values, your standards, your beliefs; I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about opening up some space when you feel a reaction coming on. About holding your truth while still being open to hear someone else’s truth. I’m talking about finding common ground. I’m talking about being willing to be wrong or to change or to put differences aside when you find yourself in common purpose with someone. Because we all live here, together, earthlings, one planet. Eight billion of us, each one different, separate, unique. No two alike. But! We are one type of being – human. And, in that, the same. We are all beings of the human sort.

Find out how to differ from others without demeaning or denigrating them. Figure out the non-zero-sum game, the one with many winners. Debate without needing to dominate. And, mostly, don’t be distracted by disagreement.

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5/19/2025